Only a year and 7 months since my last post

Not bad, I say. So is it at all possible to catch the world no one up on everything that's happened since the end of January 07? Probably not, but I figured since I decided to randomly read my friends' blogs... and then be stalker-ish and find Krista's... and because she promised to update if I do... WHY NOT POST? :D

So, I tend to have this problem where I over think things. A lot. Take, for example, my future: Well, I'm interning at a Fortune 500 company basically networking with people (the joys of being a second-level support guy), and I essentially have a guaranteed job lined up once I graduate (in December of this year). Good situation, right? Not exactly. First of all, I will be 21 for about 2 weeks before I receive my Bachelor's degree. Not saying age means much, but it means that for all intents and purposes, I'm still a freakin' kid! I don't know if I'm ready to grow up! Uncertainty is beyond scary, but I guess one can ever be absolutely certain about his/her future-- it's sort of how he/she deals with uncertainty (whether embracing it or fearing it) that determines who he/she is and who he/she will become. (Gotta love correct grammar :P).

Another example of over-thinking? Well, a little back story is needed I suppose: Rewind to late summer 07. Ryan and I were going to get a place in Panther Hall for our Junior years. We had a double picked out, got all the necessary paper work, etc. Well, turns out he didn't want to room with me at the last second, and called Panther Central the day before the deadline for getting out of a housing contract, and canceled it. So, I was roommate-less, and had a day to decide what to do. I guess, in a way, I had figured something like this would happen. I always saw the French Living/Learning Community in PA Hall as an option should something not work out. Well now, if I didn't want to be relegated to a Tower C single for the 3rd year in a row (and probably meet NO ONE again), I'd have to do it. Luckily P.C. obliged, and stuck me in PA Hall on the French floor.

I figured it'd be all intensely French, but nah... it wasn't in the slightest. Whatever. I told myself I was going to put myself out there-- make friends; get to know people; hopefully enjoy the last year I had in Pitt housing. My roommate was cool and was in a similar situation that I was in with a friend bailing on him last minute. We didn't really talk all that much (probably because he was rarely there), but we got along great.

I did, though, end up getting basically assimilated into the girls' suite down the hall. I ended up befriending Alicia (whom I had seen from Orchestra) and we ended up talking and hanging out. In the process of all this bonding, I got to know her roommates. Figured all was going well until the little cute one ran away from me the one day when I told her I knew Katie Angus after she expressed her desire to become her. Perplexed, and figuring I ended up making enemies with one of my new friend's roommates, I went back to my room and figured I'd kinda failed in my little endeavor.

Well, somehow a day or so later I ended up in the little cute one's room as we talked with Alicia and her actual roommate (the girl with whom she shared a bedroom) about visiting the gynecologist. I guess in my love for vivid images of doctors all up in female genitalia, I reached over and pulled the little cute one closer to me. I'm sure she was beyond weirded out, but whatever-- I wasn't there to judge. All I knew was she was cute and she was in my arms.

I guess for the next month or so, I pretty much exclusively lived in the aforementioned estrogen suite. I probably ended up watching more movies there than I'd ever watched before, and the little cute one and I always curled up on the couch together to do so. Not sure if either of were really certain of what to think, but hey, whatever, right?

One thing happened to lead to another as the little cute one and I grew closer and closer. Her birthday came and went, and I hope it was as memorable for her as it was for me. Somehow we ended up as a couple out of all of it, and I don't question how it happened, I just know that I'm the luckiest guy in the world. I love you, Krista.

Now how it relates to me and my irrational fear of the unknown? Well, I see her in my life. I see her in my future. I guess a better way to put this would be-- if she somehow weren't in my future, I'm not sure what I'd do with myself. And you can ask anyone about relationship futures, and they'll all tell you that they're full of uncertainty. So as far as that road goes, the only thing I can do is pray everything works out and pretty much live in the here and now, enjoying every moment I can.

I better wrap this up as I have work tomorrow. I obviously omitted quite a bit of what has happened in the past 19 months, but for those who know me, they probably would understand why. Though apart from all the utter crap I wouldn't wish on anyone that happened in that time-span, I did want to talk about the... I don't know... blessing that was bestowed upon me. She was exactly what I needed-- The direction I was searching for, so to speak. She's the sane counterpart to my fucked up head and I'm not sure what I'd do without her. I guess I'm pretty really freakin' happy, and writing it all down definitely made me realize it.

No idea when I'll update again, but until next time kiddos!